


Chris Odinson

by Anonymous



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Anti-Thor: Ragnarok, Canon Divergence - Thor: Ragnarok (2017), Crack Treated Seriously, Gagnarok, Gen, Spitefic, Thor: Ragnarok (2017), Thor: Ragnarok Fix-It, Thor: Ragnarok rewrite
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-17
Updated: 2018-08-17
Packaged: 2019-06-28 17:49:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,438
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15712074
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Thor has heard accounts of demonic possession, but he never imagined that it might happen to him one day.





	Chris Odinson

**Author's Note:**

> Because the characters were just so OOC in Ragnarok and Taika has said on many occasions that Chris was basically being himself in the movie and wasn't even acting.

The last thing Thor saw before his vision faded to black was a pigeon flying right at his face.  
  
The first thing he sees when his consciousness returns is his supposedly-dead brother standing right before him, looking very much alive and as graceful as ever.  
  
_'Loki? Is it really you?'_ Thor wants to ask, but his lips will not move. He wants to touch his brother, to ascertain that he is real, but his arms will not move no matter how hard he wills them to. He begins to wonder if he's been paralyzed by a spell, but his body suddenly starts moving on its own, to his utter horror.  
  
"Where is father?" he growls in a voice that isn't him at all, pressing Mjolnir against Loki's chest threateningly.  
  
_'Do not hurt my brother!'_ Thor wants to shout, but he is no longer in control of his body. He can feel the presence of another—Thor has heard accounts of demonic possession, but he never imagined that it might happen to him one day.  
  
_'Who are you?'_ he demands angrily. _'Why are you doing this?_ '  
  
A low, sinister chuckle rings in his head.  
  
_'Allow me to introduce myself,'_ a voice says, and Thor recognizes the accent as Australian. _'My name is Chris. Chris Hemsworth_ , _'_ the voice tells him in a smug tone. _'And from now on I will be taking over as the new God of Thunder and King of Asgard.'_  
  
_'You are not—'_  
  
Thor feels himself rapidly losing consciousness before he can finish what he wants to say.  
  
The next time he wakes, he finds himself standing before a building being demolished. He recognizes this place as Midgard. Loki is by his side, looking gorgeous in a black Midgardian suit.  
  
"I can't believe you're alive!" he hears himself hiss at Loki in an accusatory tone. "I mourned for you, I cried for you," the imposter—Chris—claims in Thor's voice, sounding as though he believes that grieving for a loved one is some impressive feat that deserves to be lauded rather than the natural thing to do, as though he's blaming Loki for making him go through the trouble for nothing.  
  
Thor thinks that this Chris is a terrible actor. Thor will never say something ungrateful like that, especially not after Loki risked his life to protect him and Jane on Svartalfheim. He's honestly just happy that his brother is alive—whatever Loki's reasons are for hiding that fact from him, Thor will gladly hear them out after he gives him a hug. They have so much they haven't talked about yet, and so much they haven't resolved between them. He has missed his brother so, so much.  
  
"I'm... honored?" Loki responds in a mildly sarcastic tone, frowning at him.  
  
Thor wishes he can tell his brother that this person isn't him. If only he can regain possession of his body and talk to Loki just for a brief moment, Loki will surely know what to do.  
  
He's abruptly snapped out of his thoughts by some fluttering sound. Something is happening around Loki—the sidewalk beneath him is glowing and pigeons are gathering in a circle around his feet, opening a portal within it.  
  
_'Loki, watch out!'_ Thor warns, but Loki has already magicked himself out of the spot and frozen the flock of pigeons into a ring of ice. With a wave of his hand Loki closes the portal, smirking.  
  
"Tsk," Chris clicks his tongue in disapproval, and Thor feels like punching him.  
  
"You sound disappointed, Brother," Loki comments nonchalantly, turning to face Thor.  
  
"Of course not," Chris laughs, playing with his hands—he seems to be obsessed with them for some reason. "I'm so glad you're safe," he lies, gritting his teeth.  
  
"You can stop pretending," Loki sighs, looking bored. "You're not really Thor, are you?"  
  
Thor cheers internally. In this moment he's so thankful for his brother's wits and perceptiveness, which have gotten them out of trouble so many times in the past but were never appreciated enough. Thor regrets this very much.  
  
Chris narrows his eyes menacingly. "I see you have already figured it out," he mutters darkly. "How did you know?"  
  
Loki tilts his head, a hint of amusement in his eye.  
  
"Well, for one thing, my brother does not speak in that ridiculous accent," he states matter-of-factly. Chris growls, tightening his grip on Mjolnir disguised as an umbrella. "For another," Loki pauses, likely for a dramatic effect.  
  
"What?" Chris demands, getting impatient.  
  
"You really are the worst actor," Loki remarks, and Thor agrees whole-heartedly.  
  
Chris' cheeks redden in embarrassment and fury. "Shut up, you space orphan!" he yells at Loki. Loki lifts an eyebrow, looking unconcerned, but this only seems to anger him even more. "Who do you think you are? You screw-up!" he shrieks, raising Mjolnir and aiming for Loki's head.

Thor has had enough. Nobody has the right to insult his brother like that.

 _'Don't you dare!'_ he roars, and thunder rumbles loudly in the sky.

Chris’ arm halts in mid-air, but he quickly recovers from the shock.  
  
_'Too bad I'm the God of Thunder now, mate,'_ he says smugly, twirling the umbrella in his hand.  
  
_'No,'_ Thor states grimly. _'You are not worthy.'_  
  
As soon as Thor makes the statement Mjolnir falls to the ground with a thump. Chris pulls with all his strength, but Mjolnir will no longer budge for him.  
  
"Thank you, Brother," Loki says softly. "Though I could have handled it myself.”  
  
_'You're welcome,'_ Thor says, even though he knows Loki probably can't hear him.  
  
"Now let us exorcise this insolent fool." Loki snaps his fingers, grinning.  
  
Thor feels the world spin and fold around him before he can feel the ground beneath his feet again. A bird materializes from within his body and falls to the ground, bouncing a few times before skidding to a stop at Loki's feet.  
  
Loki picks it up casually, pinching its wings.  
  
"I cannot believe you let this birdbrain get the better of you, Brother," Loki says, a teasing lilt in his voice.  
  
"I am the God of Pigeons, you moron!" Chris the pigeon squawks, trying to struggle out of Loki's grasp, but Loki promptly ties him up with a conjured rope.  
  
Thor ignores the pigeon and stares at his brother before him, still finding it hard to believe that any of this is real.  
  
"I'm here," Loki tells him with a small smile, as though he has read Thor's thoughts.  
  
Without a second thought Thor pulls him into a hug. "Welcome back, brother," he says simply.

“You too,” Loki returns, and it feels like home.  
  
"What did you do to my friend?" Chris interrupts angrily, breaking up the moment.

Loki holds the squirming pigeon up to his eye level and grins at it mischievously, teeth flashing.

“I think we should we cook it,” he says, turning his attention to Thor and dangling the pigeon at him.

“Roast or pan-fried would be good,” Thor suggests, licking his lips and eyeing it hungrily .

Chris squawks indignantly, squirming even harder. “Enough of this and tell me where my friend is!” he demands.

"Oh, you mean the third-rate sorcerer who opened that portal? Is that who you're working for?" Loki asks with wide eyes.

“Working _with_! I’m not a puppet!” Chris objects angrily. “Now take me to him!”

“As you wish,” Loki obliges in a sing-song voice, turning to walk down the street.

“There.” Loki points to the row of portable toilets in front of where they have stopped. “He’s in one of those.”

“How could you!”

Loki shrugs indifferently. “He was the one who chose this hiding place to spy on us. I merely trapped him where he already was.”

“Does your friend harbor a fascination for lavatories and the like? How odd,” Thor comments, and Loki huffs in amusement.

Loki waves a hand and one of the doors glows in green before opening, revealing a tall grey-haired man kneeling awkwardly on the toilet seat.

“Taika!” Chris cries emotionally.

“I’ve been,” the man named Taika pants, “locked up here for thirty minutes! I'll get you for this, you space orphan—”

Before he can continue Thor grabs Chris and knocks him flying into the cubicle with his hammer, and Loki quickly magicks it shut again.

“Let’s make it thirty hours,” Thor says, and Loki hums in agreement.

“Where do we go now?” Thor asks, hoping it’s not presumptuous of him to assume that Loki will be coming with him.

“Asgard,” Loki says. “We need to find out from Heimdall where Odin is.”

“Asgard it is.” Thor smiles.

“Heimdall, open the Bifrost!”

 

~end~

**Author's Note:**

> Credits:
> 
> Some quotes about Loki by Taika Waititi:
> 
> “Shut up, space orphan”  
> “someone who tries so hard to embody this idea of the tortured artist, this tortured, gothy orphan”  
> “…this little emo goth hanging out by himself. He was like the kid in Harry Potter [Malfoy].”
> 
> A quote by Chris Hemsworth:
> 
> "You know, in the first films, you know, a lot of the time you're seeing Thor kinda going, 'come back Loki,' and da-da-da-da. And, you know, I think there's a feeling from Thor now that's just like, 'you know what kid, do what you want.' You know, you can't hurt for trying, you know? 'You're a screw-up, so whatever. "


End file.
